Tribune: "Market Complaint Found Untrue." A Public Pulser's name and address turned out to be false. He was just looking after his health, if you know what I mean.

"Reich Announces Kharkov Taken" — a long article. It turns out that Hitler and Stalin are a couple of amateur optimists. Adolf thought he could hold his winter lines without reinforcements, and Joseph thought he could make it non-stop to Berlin.

. . . .

Eddie Dayan pops into the Astoria this morning and joins Penny, Theo and myself. "I received a card all printed in Tagalog," begins Eddie, "and I've just got it translated. It says I've been appointed chief of my neighborhood district. What the hell's that?" We all laughed.

"Means you're it," says Penny.

"Any crime they commit against the Japanese Army, you're responsible for it," I add.

"You have to pay their doctor's bills," chips in Theo, and we laugh again.

"But I don't want to be chief of my district or any other district," moans Eddie.

"You have no choice," explains Theo.

"Let's see," says Penny, "Do you own any property?"

"No."

"Have you got a job?"

"No."

"Well then, just go and say so."

"W-wait," stammers Eddie, "I don't want an investigation of my affairs. I've got several bales of textiles locked up in one of my rooms."

"They may investigate you anyway now that you're a big shot," I say. His expression gives us all another laugh.

Theo then tells us a little story about a fellow who arrived late for work one morning, with the excuse of having had to do patrol duty from midnight to 0600:

'What did you do, walk the streets?' asks the boss.

'We just stayed in our porch and talked.'

'How many were with you on patrol duty?'

'26.'

'How many families in that group of yours?'

'4.'

In other words, no one slept or did any patrolling — but they did have a rollicking good time.

...ooOoo...